BLURB:
Ed and Fred have their lives all planned out. Until they run into the zombie apocalypse. But does that mean, just because they're dead...ish, that their plans have to change? After all, don't zombies need love too?
EXCERPT:
Everybody loves a good wedding… am I right? Of course I’m right.
The butterflies of anticipation in the pit of your stomach as the Wedding
March plays. Wondering what the bride will be wearing then inwardly cringing at
the size of the meringue she thought would turn her from a sow’s ear into a
silk purse. You stand and turn, an encouragingly beatific smile ready on your
lips as she walks down the aisle; while secretly thinking the bridal boutique
must have had some kind of hall of mirrors like the ones they have at the
circus. Then you quickly brush aside your own opinions as you catch sight of
the look on the groom’s usually taciturn mug, your heartstrings twanging like
an exuberantly played harp at the pure unadulterated joy you see there. To him,
she is that silk purse, meringue or no meringue—and isn’t that
the reason we all love a good wedding? Well, that and the free bar, and the
bridesmaids, or the groomsmen depending on which bus you’re on.
But this wedding is a little different from the norm… for a start there
are two grooms. Not that that isn’t normal. Two grooms isn’t even a speck on
the radar of abnormal at this shindig. How can I put this…?
Like I said, this wedding has two grooms so there’s not even a whiff of
a meringue. The guests are… well… the guests are an eclectic bunch, to say the
least. Think Xander and Anya’s non-wedding in Buffy if that helps, but
more disturbing. The minister might remind you of Rowan Atkinson in Four
Weddings, without the nose, although he does have the ears… one of ‘em
anyway. Then there’s the smell not even the arch of roses at the altar can
disguise. It’s a stench that’s become all too familiar. An odor so intense it
makes your eyes water and whatever little food you may have eaten rise in your
throat. Not that it’s much of a problem for these wedding guests. It’s
something they’ve learned to live with day in, day out.
But They hadn’t been invited. The best man’s speech could have
been a little awkward if he’d tried to eat some of the guests at the top table.
You see I’m Ed and this is my wedding, mine and Fred’s.
And me and Fred, well… we’re… um… kinda dead.
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