Thursday, 1 September 2011
Will it Never End???
Look at this picture...aren't they just the most beautiful pair you've ever seen? Okay, you're allowed to think that your own kids are beautiful, too, but these are mine and they are bloody good-looking kids...but are they as nice as they look?
NOOOOOOOOO! They're bloody not! They are evil in carnate, the spawn of Satan - hell, I think the girl might even be Lucifer himself!
Six weeks...six bloody weeks I've been at home with them. Stupid Summer holidays. Whose idea were they? They weren't mine! I think school should be every day, including Christmas! But the end is in sight...four more days...just four more days and I'll be free again.
If I hear the following one more time...I may poke my own eyeballs out with a spoon...
I can't find my
Where did you put my
She's broken my
He's broken my
She's stolen my
He's stolen my
You've lost my
I'm bored x 2
I don't want to play in the garden with our trampoline and swing and pool, and myriad of other toys we have.
I have nothing to do
Can I have
and my all time favourite
I hate you!
I love my children, they wonderful, and beautiful and all that bollocks...but when you spend your time wondering if fifteen years to life is really such an awful prospect and that you might, God forbid, be able to have a crap without one, the other or both of them at the same time, surgically attached to your arse if you spent the rest of your life in an eight by ten cell with Bertha the big butch lesbian on the top bunk...you know it's time for them to go back to school.
So there it is...I love my kids...hate school holidays that are longer than a week, three days, two days, one day...they should be banned. Only four more days to go Lulu, only four more days....