Friday, 10 June 2011


I know I'm supposed to be the bigger person and swallow my bitterness and hurt when I meet my soon to be ex-husband's new *cough* partner, because it's for the kids' benefit and I would never do anything to upset them.  But there is a little part of me that wants to take a leaf out of Miss Underwood's book....can I?  Please can I? I bet it would feel really, really good!


  1. Wow. Hard to not be bitter when you have that going on.


  2. I love that song and have been known to sing it in my car at the top of my lungs! Along, thank God! I understand being the better person, but I also question one thing - what message does it send to the children? That changing partners in the middle of a marriage is normal and acceptable? Honestly, I see pros and cons to both points of view. But I think they need to see some culpability, you know what I mean?

    Since you said partner, is this person male or female? Just curious, normally I think people would say new girlfriend.

    Hang in there, Lisa!

  3. Yeah it is a girl Julie - I guess I can't bring myself to use the gf word yet. We've been separated for nine months and the kids know we're getting divorced - but I'm trying to encourage them to spend time with their dad. I guess the easiest way to put it is...

    Lisa doesn't want to meet her.

    Alex and Gracie's mummy does.

    If that makes sense :)

  4. I think your feelings are healthy honestly. Nine months is such a short time to have been separated especially if you were married a while. It sucks sometimes because having kids make you have to be mature sometimes, Ugh, lol. Honestly I think it's the age of the children also(my girls are 20,21 years old) because if my husband did that after 24 years of marriage I would not be nice to either of them. My girls are old enough to understand, LOL I'm sorry you're going through this Lisa it sucks and not the good kind:-)

  5. Thanks honey. People tend to think if a divorce is actually your own idea, that you're not hurt by anything that happens after that decision is made. Unfortunately it's not the case.

  6. That doesn't even make sense, Lisa, a divorce is painful no matter whose idea it was, and when you have kids, I think it's worse, because you'll always be a part of one another's lives. Forever.

    I've been separated for over six years, we've been married for 30. Luckily, the kids are grown, and we get along. But it also took me ten years to reach the decision to separate. It's never easy.

    *huggles* Stay strong, Lisa, for you and for them. I know what you mean about the two parts of you - the mother and the wife. Not the same.

  7. Hugs Lisa. Been there, done that and luckily for me, my ex just walked away when I left him with the kids as it was an abusive marriage.

    Stay strong.

  8. Oh Lisa *hug* that's a shitty situation to be in and even worse when you have to be all grownup and tolerant and, ewww hate this word, reasonable about it. 'Reasonable' meaning not making the other person feel the least bit of responsibility for his actions.
    I think it's perfectly reasonable for you to express your feelings and here is a good safe place to do it, though not nearly as satisfying as cutting all the legs of his pants or writing 'Tosser' across the back of his car in candlewax.

  9. Thanks Elin...I'm liking the Tosser and candlewax analogy - lol.

    I really don't want to meet her - but I will also never leave my kids with a complete stranger - regardless of whoever else is with them - so I don't have much choice. But heyho - I'm sure I'll get through it and lets hope he doesn't play any of his CD's any time soon - he may find them a little bit scratched....